Some important things you should know about domestic abuse:

• There is no excuse for violence; it's never justifiable.

• Without the assistance of a professional with specific training and experience in spousal abuse, the abuse will probably get worse over time. (See our information on abuser treatment for more on this.)

• Most abusers cannot change without specialized professional help, no matter what the abuser says or promises.

• Marital abuse is very damaging to children (you can't hide it from them). Most abusers themselves grew up in households with marital abuse. A majority of spousal abusers also abuse their children.

• Though your partner may blame the abuse on your actions, there is actually very little the victim can do or not do to influence the abuser's behavior.

• Victims should have a safety plan (If you do not have the Adobe Acrobat Reader you can download it here: http://www.adobe.com/products/acrobat/readermain.html )before taking action: abuse frequently escalates when victims try to take action. Call your local women's shelter for advice.